We’re allowed to be angry. It’s a human emotion. It’s there, created by our Creator, for a reason, as my friend in my FB group so eloquently put it: “It’s truly a gift 🎁 and a lightbulb moment to help us notice, something is amiss…there’s something I must repair here…”
For me, as I thought about what my friend said and leaned into my anger to process it, I realized, oh my gosh, my anger is a great big temper tantrum against Hashem. I didn’t get my way, and I’m mad!! So-and-so didn’t do what I wanted, so I’m mad!! BUT. I realized, in my lightbulb moment, that emuna is the exact opposite attitude. Emuna says, I didn’t get my way – THANK YOU G-D! IT MUST BE FOR MY BEST. Emuna says, So-and-so didn’t do what I wanted – THANK YOU G-D! YOU SAVED ME FROM MYSELF AGAIN.
Anger is all about what’s wrong. With emuna, nothing is ever wrong. Everything is always happening from a Loving Father for our Best. It’s a total state of bliss. Yes, we can have a full range of human emotion – heartbreak, rage, etc. – but we must catch it. We must cry out to Hashem with it, in honest prayer and say, I ACCEPT YOUR PLAN! THANK YOU FOR YOUR PLAN! I FEEL XYZ BUT YOUR PLAN IS BIGGER AND I WILL TURN THIS TO GRATITUDE. That’s when G-d’s mercy comes in. That’s when the peace comes in.
Anger and despair don’t change things. I mean, maybe they inspire us to take action sometimes, maybe they make us feel better in some sick way sometimes (does it really feel BETTER to feel anger and despair?), maybe they honor a part of us that was wronged (isn’t that called victimization?). But in the energetic system that our Creator set up called life, anger and despair bring down our vibration to yuck and only attract more yuck. Hashem rules the world according to our thoughts and feelings. Whatever we choose to think about and let ourselves feel consistently, will be our reality, and we will manifest more of that reality.
So how do I release anger? Believe me, I may sound all preachy preachy about this today, but I’ve got lots of anger to release. Ask. And believe. I’m asking, G-d wash away the anger, help me let it go. I’m opening my hands and letting it go. I’m believing that You are looking out for me. You are my Merciful Father always working for my best, and as the adorable and holy Rabbi Shalom Arush sang in a childlike rhyme when I saw him in Los Angeles – “If You give me, or You don’t give me, I will always thank you.”
Here’s a little exercise. Fill in the blank: “I am angry at/that: __________________.” Then whatever you put in that blank (seriously, write this down, go get a pen!), put in this blank too and meditate on it til you feel it: “Thank you SO MUCH G-d that: _____________. Thank you for ruling the world for my best! This is totally from your love for me! Thank you!”
Now I’m off to do my own exercise.