Comparing Myself to Michal in “The Wedding Plan” (Movie Review)

Wow, I do NOT have her kind of emuna (faith), I left the theatre thinking after watching The Wedding Plan.  The kind to show up to a wedding without a groom, trusting that G-d will bring one.

Quick movie summary: when Michal’s fiance tells her he doesn’t love her just weeks before the wedding, instead of calling the whole thing off, she moves forward with the intention of getting married, just not to him.  Who will be the chosson (groom)?  Will there even be one?  She’s determined that her time of being single is up, and that if she just has the courage to believe Hashem will bring her The One, He will.

I admire so much about this character (while I cynically balk at the story line; sorry, guys it’s kind of ridiculous, but I guess at 32 and never married she doesn’t have much to lose except the wedding money, so maybe it’s a tiny bit plausible).

Michal has absolutely no shame and barely even a little self-doubt, as she moves forward with the dress, and the wedding hall, and even the mikvah pre-wedding-day without a groom.  She stubbornly faces everyone and says, “I’m getting married. Why wouldn’t G-d want me to have something good?”  I cannot even bear that humiliation; my fear of what other people think has not evolved that far.  Even if I may silently, quietly believe something fiercely; facing everyone else and saying it out loud shrinks me in a corner of self-consciousness.

She doesn’t settle.  She never settles.  She actually gets proposed to quite a few times in the movie, and each time she has the clarity to see what’s going on, to be slow in the moment, and to speak honestly from the heart.  She tells them no.  One suitor asks (I’m paraphrasing), “Are you just going to marry anyone who asks?”  She has 22 days til the wedding!  Yes, she needs to marry whoever asks!  But she says no.  She’s looking for the “real deal,” whatever that translates to in Hebrew.

This is something I’m afraid I also don’t have.  (I hope it’ s okay I’m comparing myself to this fictional character and evaluating my middos beside hers.)  If that musician with the gorgeous eyes and blue jeans sweet-talked me and I had 22 days before my emuna wedding, I’d swoon, I’d say yes, I’d fall all over myself believing it was from G-d.  I just would.  Hashem, help me!

Does a groom show up for Michal’s wedding?  I won’t ruin it for you.  But I will say, there’s a man in this movie who sees her for her.  He sees her virtue, her courage, her faith, her quirky stubborn faith.  He sees her.

I want to be seen like that.

Here’s where me and Michal could be best friends.  We believe in believing.  My favorite scene in the movie (other than a particularly romantic one that I won’t spoil for you by describing here), was her argument with her seamstress over whether or not she’s crazy, or arrogant for believing Hashem will come through for her.  “The whole world was made for me,” Michal says.

If we don’t believe Hashem will come through for us, what’s the point of religion?  If we don’t believe He’s real and can really do stuff, good stuff, what’s the point of religion?  I get that it’s difficult to know what Hashem wants to do; I get that we don’t want to presume on His goodness; I get every argument that seamstress made.  But I GET Michal, and I want to see people really believe.  Maybe not taking it to the level she did in this cute movie, maybe they will.  I’m just frustrated by dead religion.  I’m frustrated by empty, sheepy following without any real trust or real fears or real anything.  I’m tired of believing Hashem doesn’t want to come through.

What would happen if we were all just a tiny bit more courageous?  What would happen if we dared a tiny bit more to believe Hashem wanted something good for us, and to walk toward it without any proof it was going to happen?  I think we’d see miracles.  I pray for that kind of strength and emuna!



Enjoy the trailer –

wedding plan

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